Choosing your first size

The most common first-purchase mistake is buying too big. Product photos have no scale, and size names differ between makers. Here is a simple way to choose well.

Start from something you know

Numbers mean little without a reference. Use one you can check at home. A finger is about 2 to 2.5 inches around. Two fingers together are roughly 4 inches around. A standard soda can is 8.2 inches around, which is far bigger than most people expect, and far bigger than a sensible first toy.

If you have measured anything that you know is comfortable, use that. If you measure a body part or object, wrap a strip of paper around it, mark where it meets, and measure the strip.

Pick smaller than you think

For a first toy, choose a girth at or just below what you already know is comfortable. A toy that turns out slightly small still gets used. A toy that is too big sits in a drawer, and most can't be returned.

As a rough guide, many people start between 4 and 5 inches around. For anal use, start at the lower end, and only use toys with a flared base.

Shape matters as much as size

• A tapered tip makes starting easier than a blunt one.
• A smooth shaft is more predictable than one with a knot or pronounced ridges.
• Usable length matters less than you'd think. You don't have to use all of it.

Firmness

Many makers offer the same toy in soft, medium and firm silicone. Softer silicone gives and compresses, so it is more forgiving at a given size. Firm silicone holds its shape and feels larger. For a first toy, soft or medium is the safer choice.

Then use the tools

Open Next size and choose "Don't own one yet". Set a girth and length you're confident about, and you'll get options from every brand close to that size. Use Compare to see any of them next to a soda can at true scale before you buy.

This is general sizing guidance, not medical advice. Go slowly, use plenty of lubricant suited to the toy's material, and stop if anything hurts.